Previously On…RHONJ Season 9 Reunion Part 3 Recap!
Previously On part three of the RHONJ reunion, it was time for a mass conclusion after part one and part two focused solely on the women and their grievances toward one another. Up until then, only one house husband had joined in on the fun, Joe Gorga, who has ties to two of the wives: his sister is Teresa and his wife is Melissa so technically, he is an unofficial housewife. The episode started the way part two ended- by talking about Joe Giudice getting deported upon leaving prison. He has been in American since he was one but is not a US citizen so it was decided he should go back to Italy, something Teresa has been appealing. But, she made it known if he does go to Italy, she and their four daughters will not be going with him. She does not think it is right, with them being so young, to uproot their lives and move them out of the country. As for a “long distant” relationship, as she calls it, she knows it would never work as he would go out with other women. Okay then. Teresa did claim she has been faithful since Joe has been away but no one really knows how accurate this statement is. Host, Andy Cohen brought up the fact that Teresa was on an edition of “The Celebrity Apprentice” and does know both Ivanka and Donald Trump so he asked why she has not appealed to them to keep Joe in the country. She said maybe she should try that. I think she is just ready for him to leave and to truly start a new life sans Juicy Joe.
Time for the husbands who aren’t imprisoned to join the stage, including exes and rehash the season with their significant others. For the first time ever, Andy asks the men to say what their housewives tagline would be and they have had some time so here we go:
- Bill Aydin (husband of Jennifer): “A nip/tuck a day allows my wife to spend and play.” (And maybe he gets to play just a little)
- Evan Goldschneider (husband of Jackie): “I have four kids, two degrees, and one kick-ass wife.” (Jackie’s exact tagline with a tweaking at the end but hey, he tried)
- Frank Catania (Dolores’ ex-husband): “I work hard, I play hard, until I spent all my money on boats and whores.” (this is the best tagline ever)
- Joe B. (husband of Margaret): “If you want the job done right, ask me, and I’ll do your wife.” (I feel violated)
- Joe Gorga (husband of Melissa and draped in a gold cape which is his housewives dress for the moment): “I don’t flip tables, I have sex on them,” and, “I’m not a plumber but I know how to lay pipe.” (Joe is the best! Never change)
Now that we know the husbands have some mild creativity in them, it is time to bring out the dreaded Danielle Staub, who is without a husband as her marriage to Marty Caffrey barely lasted the season but took up enough episodes to make me want to run for the hills. It is clear she is a toxic person and she talks about how she attempted to sell her wedding ring online for 35K. She also talks about the expensive wedding dress she wore which was roughly the same cost as what she was looking to get for her ring. Jennifer chimes in and tells her she should have just gone to China and gotten a better value. Speaking of Jennifer, when Andy asked Bill how he felt when Jenn was constantly mentioning their 16 bathrooms, he says he wished she had kept it quiet because he wants the kids to know they work hard for what they have. No, he works hard. I have no idea what she does. He also said he did not mind waiting until marriage to sleep with her because the element of surprise was amazing to which Joe G. is shocked. He wonders what it would have been like if something crazy was going on down there. Leave it to Joe.
Back to Danielle. She has nothing nice to say to Margaret though Marge wishes her the best and hopes she finds happiness but Danielle just cannot do the same though she can pull out a beautiful necklace for Tre with their initials engraved in it. That’s…weird. But, there was more jewelry as Jenn gifted her with some, as well. It is the Teresa show and I am about to gag because she did not deserve all of these toys yet here she is getting them. One shocker is that Joe B. and Marty have made up despite all of the smack Marty talked about Margaret’s physical appearance and him ultimately ending up in the pool at Jenn and Bill’s 16th anniversary red party. He deserved it, let’s not sugar coat anything. But, Jennifer is in for a real shock when she learns from Margaret that Danielle has a very colorful past which includes pornhub and a past as a stripper, possible affairs with a married man, claims Danielle made in her own book. This may be a little too much for Jenn sans tequila.
It is all a bit uncomfortable until the women ask Joe G. to bring out something and tell Andy to stay put. That is when Joe brings out a mini Mercedes with a Jersey license plate for Andy’s new son, whom had yet to be born yet. Also included is an Adidas track suit that said the REAL AC. They have flipped tables but in this moment, they flipped from crazy ladies to mama bears and each one offered words of wisdom to the papa to be and you could see how much it meant to him. He is now father to baby Benjamin Allen and is over the moon. No word on when RHONJ will return but rumor has it that filming is starting very soon, if not already and Joe Giudice is to be released this month so we will keep you updated with all of that drama. But, do not worry. You won’t miss the housewives much as we have you covered with RHOBH and RHONY! Thanks for watching!
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