Previously On…RHONJ Season 9 Reunion Part 1 Recap!

Previously On RHONJ, we watched as Jennifer celebrated her 16th anniversary with a red party. Of course, with Danielle and Marty in attendance, it did not go quite as planned as you can see right here. Now, onto part one of the reunion and pardon the lateness; this writer was battling some severe bronchitis so I hope everyone is feeling good and drinking a lot of fluids.

So, as we already pretty much knew, Teresa’s husband, Joe will be deported post-prison release and then we talk quickly about plastic surgery as Margaret had a face lift in between the show ending and the reunion. Dolores confessed she had one in the past, as well along with butt injections and Jackie admitted she had a tummy tuck. After all, she has delivered two sets of twins so I guess she has earned it! We reflect on Margaret’s season first and how she did her gala, tried to reunite her family, and showering with her husband. They shower together every day; is it to conserve water? They do not have sex in there but they do have sex 3-4 times a week, same with Jackie. We have to address Marge’s housekeeper, Marleny, whom everyone loves and how her former stepson, Brett is starting to talk to his dad, Jan again. And no, her home is not in foreclosure after the whole Vineyard Vines incident which we know very little about. She did already know Jackie prior to the show and gave her some advice. Jennifer chimes in with her preconceived notions about the women and this was her first time having real girlfriends but she complains about Oklahoma once again. Why can’t she get over this hill? She sounds even more like a snob when she talks down about Oklahoma and farms!

Time for a family reflection and to see what it is like having a bunch of kids in all of the families: it is chaos, especially having watched Melissa and Teresa’s kids grow up from the jump. Andy Cohen asks Teresa about Milania’s nails as she has these long acrylics at just 12 but she laughs and says she loves it because it is just like her. Melissa’s daughter, Antonia is embarrassed by her while some of the newer kids have become hams for the cameras. Dolores’ son, Frankie is now 20 and officially single so is empty nesting and the last we heard, she was seeing her boyfriend, David just once a week and wanted an apartment. Now, her ex, Frank Sr. is building a home for David and they see each other every day and just went to Italy but she will not live with him unless she has a ring. She has had great results from her shelter ladies, finding one a home, despite her financial position. When asked if she hates Melissa, she seemed dodgey but said she does not hate her. I was waiting for the whole “per-say” to follow.

Now, onto to Jennifer. Can I not vomit? From her braggart moments to drunken days in Cabo with her monkey’s butt lips; she was an…addition. Jenn does not like how vocal Marge was about having an affair with her husband, Joe while married to Jan and it lasted for over a year before she told now ex-husband, Jan. Yet, Marge thinks an arranged marriage, common in Turkey, is very antiquated and this is why she jokingly referred to an arranged marriage as a “mail order bride.” She throws back to Jenn how Jenn’s mom said her brother should be with all the American women before he settled down with his Turkish bride and it was an easy joke to make. Teresa claims she did not know what a mail order bride was prior to Marge saying it. Jennifer’s retaliation was all about Marge and her mom both having affairs so it is a pattern and Jackie says it all goes back to keeping it out of the family. Jenn can dish it but cannot take it so she refers to Melissa, Jackie, and Marge as Larry, Curly, and Moe.

Onto the necklace that the women gave Teresa in Cabo after her competition which Jennifer insulted because they did not have her brother make it. Marge feels Tre should have defended the women and shut down Jenn but she did not do this as Tre is a bumbling fool and idiot. I am so sick of the way she always just plays these head games and sides with the wrong person. She has a sickness. They go back to Jenn talking about her 16 bathrooms from the time they were in Oklahoma and even Andy has to say it was obnoxious and it happened a lot. She could not let it go over and over and over. Jennifer just cannot stop herself and she needs just to be put out of her misery. Tre says Jenn is much like her but that is not a compliment on any side.

Teresa starts crap when it comes to a friendship with Jackie, Melissa, and Marge, pointing out they are sitting on the same side of the couch. Melissa reminds her they were told where to sit and now it is on to Jackie’s history and welcoming to the show. She ended the season by reconnecting with her sister after 15 years but started by revealing she had an eating disorder. She says she sees a nutritionist once every two months to keep herself in check and, because of Jackie, we learned Dolores had an eating disorder as well. For seven years, Jackie was a lawyer then she landed a newspaper column. Over last summer, Jackie reconnected with her sister. Though they would see each other, they would never talk to one another but this has since changed dramatically. Because Jackie has a learning disabled brother, it has made her want to stand up to bullying more. This is when Teresa says Jackie wants to be her and shares a photo of Jackie at one of Teresa’s book signing. Jackie admits she was shoe shopping with her kids and saw four people outside of a bookstore waiting to meet Teresa. She was a fan of the show so she met her. They go at it and then Teresa takes a jab at Jackie’s eating disorder asking if she is hungry.

Teresa keeps making threats towards Jackie and she just looks like trash. Flashback to when Jackie asked Tre if a woman could control her man, would her husband be in prison. Then, the article she wrote about Jennifer’s “spoiled” kids which was actually flattering in the end. Jackie says she thinks Teresa tries to scare people as she previously said if you say the wrong thing to her, you will be gone from the show. Then, Tre says Jackie has no “compassionate,” whatever this means. They ask why Melissa did not back up Teresa, being her sister-in-law, but she says Jackie was just backing up Melissa so why would she defend Tre. Tre seemingly cannot shut up and say anything nice; she is just putting on a mean girl persona which I am hoping it is for show but am wondering. She calls Jackie a “cold hearted b****” and I am ready to flip a table.

Part 2 continues with the conversation of Joe’s deportation, Jackie and Tre going back at each other, and Melissa over Tre. You can watch it Wednesday night at 9pm on Bravo.

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